Undercover at THE NAZ

After attending Kenyon for a full year and almost a half, I came to the realization that I had never actually seen a student from Mount Vernon Nazarene University, or as we affectionately call it, The Naz....until last week.  I was having a fine dining experience at Ruby Tuesday's, when I saw one.

SIDENOTE: Ruby Tuesday's cheesy garlic biscuits are TO DIE FOR.  I plan on taking over the Caples kitchen for weeks until I discover the secret recipe.

I will enslave this man and force him to bake me cheesy biscuits

Yes, a real student from The Naz.  I could tell because this specimen was wearing a sweatshirt from the university and looked like she had crawled out of a cornfield.  It was at this point when I realized that not only was this the first bonafide student I had ever seen, but that despite all of the signs pointing to The Naz, I had never actually seen any evidence that it existed.  I was now determined to find the fabled university, no matter how far into rural Ohio I had to venture.  Luckily, my boyfriend was equally curious, and we took off to search for the Promise Land.

After about ten minutes of driving through Mount Vernon we saw a church.  After passing this church we saw...a university!  But it was not just any day at The Naz, oh no, we happened to stumble upon SonFest (Son, like God...not sun, like the planet).  SonFest appears to be somewhat like our Sendoff, only it happens at the beginning of their school year, there are more small children, and there's no alcohol (The Naz is a dry campus, who knew!?).  My boyfriend and I thought we would just crash the carnival, listen to one of the Jesus bands performing, grab a cotton candy and head out.  However, apparently you had to pay something like 20 dollars for a ticket, so we decided to just walk around campus instead.  I even adopted the codename Delilah in hopes that The Plain White T's would serenade me I could stay undercover.  Here are our findings:

The Bookstore:  Very small, and all the books (novels included) were about religion.  My personal favorite was the section devoted to dating while staying abstinent, and getting others to join you in this venture.  

The Student Lounge:  My only note about this is why don't we have a legit student lounge??  

The Academic Buildings:  The academic buildings at The Naz are reminiscent of your high school science corridors.  They are completely linoleum, cold, and avoided like the plague.  Also, courses like Home Ec. are still taught The Naz, along with courses that we could only assume were something along the lines of "how to be a good mother".  This makes sense since there is a preschool on campus.  A preschool!  For children!  Like the children of the students!  This is confusing though because there is a strict curfew in place for all students and you can't spend in the night in another student's room (however you CAN be signed out for the weekend...whoopee!).  Sex and dancing are also outlawed.  Like BYU for the uncoordinated.  Or high school.

 My previous ideas of The Naz were blown out of the water.  Still sore about not being able to get into SonFest, my boyfriend and I high-tailed it for the car and I am so happy to be back on a campus where I can stay out past midnight and wear clothes that show my shoulders.