Chocolate Kisses, Martyred Heads

Oof.  Last week was HELL.  I have fallen behind on Once Upon a Time and The Bachelor...so you know this shit's serious.  I have been wondrously fortunate enough to have been cast in two fabulous productions and I am beyond excited.  But.  With back-to-back rehearsals and classes I don't even have time to go to Peirce, let alone sleep.

But, with the help of the Scissor Sisters and the chocolate-filled Valentine's packages from my mom, I am back in business.

Now, I didn't watch the Grammys because "frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn."  But the whole internet has been abuzz over Chris Brown performing, so I decided to put down the peanut butter M&Ms and look into it.  What shocks me even more than the fact that for some reason a majority of our country is okay with a man who would hit his girlfriend performing at a national, televised event, is that there are a ton of girls who are announcing publicly (on Twitter but still) that they would let Chris Brown beat them.  That is so insulting to any woman who has ever been a victim of domestic abuse that it makes me sick.  Everyone is entitled to their own opinion but all those cute little blonde girls from the suburbs saying they would like Chris Brown to punch them in the face need to keep it to themselves, and maybe see a therapist.

On a happier love-related note, Valentine's Day is tomorrow.  The day where we all celebrate a bunch of martyred Roman saints by giving candy and flowers to people we love.  St. Valentine really had nothing to do with sentimental love, in fact I would argue that Valentine's day is a bit more like Halloween.  Did you know St. Valentine's head is on display?  That's right, he was decapitated, martyred, then preserved.  If you really want to leave an impression on your love-bug, nothing says "I care about you" like a shocking reminder about the origin of this holiday.

Till death do us part

But we have a lot of interesting holidays that have stemmed from religious tradition:

Easter - How did the re-birth of Christ become associated with a giant bunny who leaves eggs behind?  If you're going to confuse the reproduction systems of mammals and birds for the sake of the church, at least make it somewhat realistic.  I'm pushing for Easter Platypus 2012.

Christmas - I don't know about you guys, but it's pretty normal to bring foliage into my house to celebrate birthdays.  And why use the door when you could come in through the chimney?  I think that and the whole flying reindeer thing is a weird modes of transportation trope, a tie-in to how Jesus could walk on water.  I guess you could make the connection to St. Nicholas, who has an uncanny ability to up wheat production.  Fat man in a red suit and the Saint of wheat thins.  I totally see it.

Halloween - This comes from a pagan tradition so it makes a little more sense.  This was the day when the physical and spiritual worlds were closest.  But for some reason we seem to have lost the tradition of human and animal sacrifice over time.

Enjoy your pseudo-religious holiday tomorrow!